Religion, Spirituality, Humanity… and Pretzel Sticks!

Before I get to the issue at hand I should mention that I have and will likely continue to openly mock and even capitalizing on religious extremism and off the wall religious people (for comedic purposes), it’s not a fuck you to God or anything, it’s just what interests and amuses me. I’m not above knocking self-righteous Atheists either, I mean come on, you’re Atheist, why do you have to join groups and clubs? Isn’t the big appeal of Atheism the fact that you don’t have to attend church, sit through long drawn out drivel or read vintage typewriter sized books?! I’m not saying Atheists are liars, although sometimes there is a level hypocrisy normally reserved for the Catholic church, I’m just saying shut the fuck up for a minute and listen. Let’s get on without  it then….


Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about things I can not posses with a gift certificate or a piece of plastic with a chip in it, something you can’t necessarily physically reach out and touch, spirituality, theism, the soul, why we’re here, how bad I want milkshake right now. I know this is heavy shit, but I’m not one to brush of philosophical quests in order to “keep from going crazy”, call me insane, but I actually want some answers, or at least a few deep thoughts and a punchline at the end.


One thing that has always amused me about certain religious followers is how their book of magic, mysticism & peyote trips is considered sacred and flawless, yet a slightly different holy book is considered a book of untruths or a fairy tale, to me that level of hypocrisy is hilarious. Picture a man arguing the inaccuracy of A Christmas Carol while praising the realism of Goldilocks and the Three Bears, now you get the idea.

Don’t get me wrong, religion has done great things for society, and to this day Christian groups are very involved with Darfur and building shelters and feeding the poor worldwide, but it’s pretty hard to cancel out the Crusades and good old fashioned batshit crazy Evangelical Christians, all that death, destruction and Pat Robertson in the name of religion proves to me that for all it’s good religion has just as much evil, one could even argue religion is more sinister than it is wholesome and not really worth all the trouble it causes. And don’t even think about depicting a certain Prophet, unless you want to wind up in a morgue and have you favourite national pastry renamed in the Middle East.


Religion seems to be a thing of the past at Loyalist College, I’m not saying it’s non-existent here, it just isn’t prominent in the slightest, it feels like there are more jugglers at Loyalist than there are church-going-people. Although the total apathy of many students and young Canadians in general could have something to do with this trend.



Some would argue by definition you can not be spiritual without believing in God(s), which is interesting, is I am neither and find most “spiritual” people douchey.



To me this is the most important of all, what are we without each other? Lost. Can you even argue something like that? Even if you had God, you would be useless without other people. Whether there is a God(s) or there is not a God(s) we need to start worrying about this life, not the next, let’s look after each other and be decent human beings not because we have to but because we want to.

Now be a good friend and pass the pretzel sticks, I’m hungry.

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